Are You Going To Sc arborough Fair?

Ah..another long winter walk to the station 駅.

The helicopters of the US occupying force are flying overhead; children's conversations cease as I draw near then resume twice as loudly after I've passed by and make me yearn for the days, not so long ago when I didn't understand anything they were saying; and mothers walk by in pairs with their long bench-warming soccer coats and clothed toy-dogs, (neither of which were popular a year ago) casting the foreigner 外人 a weary eye, not knowing or caring that I've probably spent all day teaching their kids.

Ah..sweet Japan 日本.

So every month (or something like that) the Japanese English teachers 先生 choose an English song that the kids sing at the beginning of each class to practice their listening and pronunciation skills.
The song I heard first was "We are the world".

I thought the song was the perfect song for the kids to practice; simple, wordly and easy. And I enjoyed it.

That was the first class of the day of four classes in a row. Four hours later I was..uh..singing a different tune.

I can't even listen to songs that I like 4 times in 4 hours.
This went on for about a month. (I'm not exactly sure. It all fades into a blur)
Naturally, being familiar with the song and a native English speaker, I had the song memorized the second time around, adding to my frustration. But I thought it couldn't get any more uncomfortable.

My first day at the following school the class began to the familiar chords of Cyndi Lauper's (is that how you spell her name? Who cares..) "Time After Time".

Ouch.

By this time the insanity induced by listening to that particular song 4 (sometimes 5 or 6) times a day for 5 straight days (sometimes continuing into the next week) reduced me to looking out the window or pretending to
read a book while I I held in laughter solely because of the strength of my abdominal muscles. "Time After Time" broke me, though, and a few times I broke out in sudden, violent giggle fits that disrupted the entire class. (YOU listen to 40 twelve-year Japanese kids sing that song via reading katakana and see how long you can hold out: "If you faur, I rill catch you; I'r be raiting...time after time.."

You'll never make it past the chorus.

"Time After Time" was followed by Mariah Carey's (is that how you spell her name? Who cares..) "All I Want For Christmas Is You".

I think the only thing in this reality more annoying than Christmas in Japan and Mariah Carey is both of those things occuring simultaneously.

That's a lie.

Listening to the song every day, 3 or 4 times a day, for a week, as sung by a classroomfull of too-cool-for-school Japanese teenagers trying to make it sound worse than it really is at 9 o'clock in the morning...that's worse.

It may as well be your wake-up alarm.

This was followed by John Lennon's (I know how to spell that one) "Imagine", a reprieve at this point, followed by the current song and blog entry title "Do You Know The Way To Scarborough Fair" as sung by Simon and Garfunkle (how many ways can there be to spell "Garfunkle").

In an effort to stay sane I have resorted to researching as much about the song on my cell phone WHILST singing along heartily to keep my mind busy, and as a result I now know more than any mortal who hasn't done a Ph.D. in 17th century European history should about said Fair situated in said town.

For example:

Did you know that parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme are the ingredients in both a medievel love spell AND abortive treatment？ Talk about jilted lovers.

Also have you noticed that two of those herbs are girl's names and two share pronunciation with words of completely different meaning？

I have. And I will take that information with me to my grave.

My next karaoke stint should be a memorable one, as I belt out perfect renditions of the preceeding songs all in a row and proceed to bore everyone with useless trivia about each song in between..